Emotional Blackmail

April 28, 1997
Continuing to excavate territory that is often buried in subterfuge and misunderstanding, psychologist Forward (Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them) here turns her attention to relationships in which one person repeatedly manipulates another at the expense of not only the victim's autonomy but of their well-being, self-respect and integrity. Labeling such behavior "emotional blackmail," Forward describes who does it, how it's done and the many ways and reasons people succumb to it. She encourages the "targets" to take responsibility for their own behavior and for their compliance with their blackmailers. Forward helps readers identify the steps of emotional blackmail (demand, resistance, pressure, threats, compliance and repetition), the types of blackmailers (punishers, self-punishers, sufferers and tantalizers) and the inner motivations of both parties involved. Providing the kind of gentle support that a good therapist offers clients face-to-face, the author leads readers through the necessary steps to clear the "FOG" (fear, obligation and guilt) that "emotional bullies" use, to stand up to their pressure and to carry out effective "strategies... for ending emotional blackmail." Forward offers useful information, effective skills and the compassionate encouragement that victims of this kind of manipulative behavior need to change themselves, their relationships and their lives. $60,000 ad/promo; simultaneous HarperAudio; author tour; foreign rights sold in the U.K., Germany, Taiwan, the Netherlands, Brazil; first serial and dramatic rights: Virginia Barber.